


i lied to you

by kota23



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Anxiety, Author Projecting onto TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Body Dysphoria, Depressed TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Gender Dysphoria, Hurt TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Hurt/Comfort, Mentioned Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Older Sibling Wilbur Soot, Panic Attacks, Protective Wilbur Soot, Trans Male Character, Trans TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-19
Updated: 2021-02-19
Packaged: 2021-03-15 01:15:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,126
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29551263
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kota23/pseuds/kota23
Summary: trans tommyinnit comes out to wilbur. big brother wilbur makes him feel safe. self projection pog !!tw for gender dysphoria and slight panic !!
Relationships: No Romantic Relationship(s)
Comments: 11
Kudos: 523





	i lied to you

Tommy was angry.

He was angry at himself, mostly, or maybe at the world. Angry at whoever made him like this. Angry at the sheer concept of himself. 

He wanted to shout his lungs out at the sky, or maybe curl into a ball and never move. 

Today was one of those days. The days where the dysphoria got too much, and Tommy couldn’t bear to look at himself in the mirror or hear his stupid deadname again. No matter how much he told himself that it was okay, that his family didn’t know they were deadnaming him, it still stabbed him in the heart every single time.  
So there he was, a mess under several blankets in an attempt to cover up who he is. He had been binding for 16 hours already. He frankly didn’t care to stop.

“Tahlia!” A familiar voice sounded from the hallway.

Tommy groaned, turning over and flopping his phone on the bedsheets next to him. He rubbed his eyes. *That’s not my name*, he grumbled silently. *Why can’t they see?*

*Because you’re too much of a pussy to tell them,* a voice inside him whispered.

*I’m not a pussy,* Tommy snapped back at it. *I just.. don’t know how to tell them.*

*They’ll hate you. They know you’ll never be a boy.*

Tommy was tearing up now.

*Boys don’t cry, you know.*

*Shut the fuck up.*

Really, Tommy knew his family would be supportive. They said it all the time. “Trans rights”. He knew. Yet, for some reason, Tommy was terrified of telling them. He knew how they treasured their “annoying little sister” - he cringed at that phrase, curling in on himself in an attempt to rid the concept. 

“Tahlia?” The voice came again, uttering the cursed name. It was Wilbur. Frankly, Tommy forgot he called in the first place.

The door creaked open, and Wilbur ducked under the doorframe to peer at the mess that was Tommy in the darkness. “You a’right?” 

Tommy nodded slowly. Wilbur didn’t seem convinced. He slowly stepped into the dark room, closing the door softly behind him. 

Tommy couldn’t see his face well, but he knew it was etched in brotherly concern and love. It almost made him feel safe. As if he could tell him. As if he could just let go, let it burst, let it drain from his tired body - and melt into Wilbur’s warm arms of sunshine and warmth. To cry into his sweater and feel the arms stroking his back. To feel comforting whispers from the British man’s deep, gentle voice. 

He longed to be held, to be taken care of like a baby. To feel validation and pure love from one of his favorite people. To stifle the longing for touch that echoed inside his skin.

But he said nothing, despite what his instincts screamed. He stayed still, avoiding eye contact as Wilbur sunk down on the bed.

“So what’s wrong?” his brother asked gently. Of course he could tell, Wilbur always read Tommy like an open book with Sparknotes annotations.

More silence as Tommy stared into the distance with blank eyes. His hands were shaking. No, no, he couldn't tell Wilbur.

Wilbur cocked his head. “Tahlia, you know you ca-”

“Stop!” Tommy spat suddenly, bringing his knees to his chest. “St- stop. Don’t- don’t..”

Shit. He didn't mean to do that.

The older man froze, panic rising behind his eyes. He had never seen Tommy like this, and was very unsure of what to do in this situation. Yet, he had dealt with his fair share of panic attacks, and knew well when one was approaching.

“Hey, hey, sis, breathe, alright?” Wilbur reached out to his sibling, pulling back when Tommy flinched. "Are you-"

“Wilbur, I’m-” Tommy choked on another sob and buried his face in his knees.

“You’re what?” 

“I’m not - Tahlia,” He spat out the name angrily as if it burned his throat to speak it. Tommy noticed Wilbur’s confused eyes, and tried to steady his breathing before continuing. “I’m not.. your sister,”

“What do you mean?” Wilbur reached out again, relaxing when Tommy allowed it this time. He brushed the blonde’s hair out of his face, gazing at the tear-pricked blue eyes with love.

“Wilbur, I’ve lied to you. I’m not- I’m not a girl.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“Can… can I hug you?”

And there Tommy's brother sat, arms outstretched in a show of love. He looked warm and shining. Wilbur was the sun. Wilbur was always the sun - the caring, talented, funny, chaotic, beaming, laughing, fluffy man that lit up any room. The man who made everyone feel safe, with his sickeningly honeysweet voice and stupid beautiful guitar and his soft laughter and his annoyingly bright yellow sweater, that God it looked so soft and warm to touch, and Tommy was so so cold-

Before Tommy said anything, he threw himself into Wilbur’s arms. 

He felt the sunlight of Wilbur leak into him. Melting away at the icyness of Tommy's heart. Dripping from his veins and leaving nothing but a helpless little brother, exhaling shakily with every breath.

God it felt nice.

Neither of them said anything for a long time, just Tommy’s breathing slowly steadying as he relished in the brotherly affection, and Wilbur rubbed his back.

“I’m glad you told me..” Wilbur paused. “What do I..”

“Tommy. It’s Tommy. And I'm- I'm a boy." It felt odd to say aloud, but it was a huge weight off his chest. 

Wilbur smiled wide. A genuine smile, Tommy could tell. It made him shine brighter.

"Hey, Tommy."

Tommy couldn't help breaking a cheeky smile too. He felt warm and flowery.

"You're amazing, Toms. And you're my little brother, always. Love you."

"Yeah," Tommy grinned, "I'm the best brother."

"You are?"

"Mhmm. I'll get so many women. And I'll- I'll-" Tommy yawned wide.

Wilbur chuckled softly. "And you'll what?"

"And I'll be so very masculine, and get taller than you, bitch." He blinked tiredly at his brother.

"Oh, yeah?" Wilbur said in his teasy voice. 

"Mm," Tommy grunted into Wilbur's shirt. Wilbur wrapped his arms around the boy more securely. 

Wilbur looked down at the small kid buried in his chest. Pure brotherly love boiled inside him. The thought of Tommy ever hurting again- it made him pissed, to be honest.  
It'd take some getting used to, and a lot of issues along the way, probably- but now, Wilbur had another little brother to protect. And he would make sure Tommy was happy.

"'M sleepy, Wil."

"I know."

"Hm?"

"Go to sleep, gremlin."

"Bitch," Tommy murmured one more time before passing out heavily on Wilburs shoulder.

Phil found them the next morning sprawled on each other in the cutest cuddly position he'd ever seen.

**Author's Note:**

> this is the first time i've tried writing anything for like . years. so comments and kudos mean the world to me!! i know im not the best but i appreciate u reading :)


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